Daily bread

Our recent move to Virginia, as good and as smooth as it has been, 
hasn't necessarily been...
easy.


Financially speaking, we went from a good salary and a half, 
with no real housing costs, limited food and transportation costs; 
to receiving a fellow stipend with which to pay housing, food, and transportation.  


Like I said, it hasn't necessarily been...
easy.


But it has been eye-opening and faith-widening.


I've experienced a measure of life in the desert.
But manna always comes in the morning.


Today, it rained down clothes.


She didn't know. She was just clearing out sizes too small from her half-head taller boy. A simple gesture, really.  Sorting clothes, giving them away.  It just to happened that we really needed some new shirts for our strapping son who seems to grow inches overnight.  She didn't know that her sorting and folding were Holy.  She was the arm of God dusting our earth with bit of heaven, manna sustaining us one more day.


Trusting in God's provision has been a steep learning curve for me.  


What is enough?  


Even when our storehouses were full and overflowing, budgets were thrown to the wind, bellies were well-satisfied, there was still a part of me that craved more.  


So, what is enough?


St. Tersea of Avila wrote,

God alone is enough.

Let nothing upset you,

let nothing startle you.

All things pass;

God does not change.

Patience wins

all it seeks.

Whoever has God

lacks nothing:

God alone is enough.

Enough is God.

But if I'm real honest, the cynical part of me wonders if this is easy for me to say, knowing that my situation is temporary.  

Does it sound trite and too simple?  

Reckless and irresponsible? 

Maybe.

But in the deepest part of my soul knows this still to be true. 

For my soul will always be searching...

My soul will never be at rest until it is in God.

With money in the bank or not. 

The humanity of me wants to hoard. 

I want to gather more manna than what I need for the day.

I want a check for $50k to land in my direct deposit to ease 

the black/red line each month. 

I want to grasp/cling at relationships to ease the pain of being alone and new.

I want to over-plan and over-function to control my future.

But really, that would be the easy way out. 

Because it blinds me from seeing God's daily movement.

And so I pray the only way I know how,

"...give us this day our daily bread..."

Bread, given daily.

Sustaining my needs for today.

Knowing that tomorrow's bread will come...

tomorrow.